Dinner Conversation

my home is love and i’ve been dying to get back. 

i know now that where ever you go and no matter how much i miss you, this is exactly what i want and i am beyond content to have you in my heart. 

i thought i was walking through that door and into compassion. instead i sat in misery and my self-loathing. stupid obsession over what i want. unaware that i may have i missed my shot. how could his heart change that much? i just want one person to show me i deserve everything and they want me. no matter what. i wish my own perceptions were enough. i wish i didn’t need anyone to validate me.

the many different shades of people show themselves through their ugliest behaviors. 

i miss hearing my voice spew through my words. my essence trap in my convoluted thoughts harnessed by my contradicting will. my moods whiplash every time he crosses my mind or my heart. this unbearable longing for closure needs to dissipate, but as soon as i think it is i am thrown back on the needles of his heart.

1) What is it about your major that you enjoy? I enjoy the work. I enjoy the stress and confusion of perfecting my art as much as possible and seeing it become a success on stage (if it does). I also love to share my work with an audience, I never need a compliment or to talk to them about what they saw, I just love sharing my passion with people.  2) How did you become involved with STA? When? I auditioned for STA’s production of W.A.S.P back in November of 2010. I got into that show and every other one since. 3) How many performances have you been in? I’ve been in six shows since coming to college, two of them being STA productions. 4) Favorite story so far from time spent with the program?  The performances of The Serpent are my favorite memories to think about. The whole cast has so many stories and shared moments we love to share together so I couldn’t just pick one. That whole show in general has been my favorite story. 5) Are you excited for next year?  I am looking forward to next year. 6) Why or why not? I’m curious to see what new talent we get, as well as the choices of productions for next year. Plus, I’ll be directing a ten minute for the first time in the fall which I am really looking forward to.